From Parent Trap To Lynwood... Part Two...

If From Parent Trap To Lynwood Part One wasn't enough, continue reading. Arriving home from a long day of work and looking forward to starting my do nothing but watch gLee and football all weekend, I caught up on all the Hollywood headlines that had developed during the day.Starting with the ever so trust worthy TMZ, I saw the bright red box that read: BREAKING NEWS. (Insert Justin Bieber Squeal)  Lindsay Fails Drug Test. One source down, two to go. I continued on  to Perez Hilton. Had he confirmed the news? Yes Sirrrr. If my next source had confirmed the news, it was time for me to flip out. People.com read, "Lindsay Admits Failing Drug Tests" All three sources confirmed, flipping out Sara a go.

     After the excitement had worn off, new reports (per Linday's so called friends) were claiming, "The reports about her failing drug tests are bogus." Fast forward two hours later.... and an official tweet from the starlet later, "This was certainly a setback for me but I am taking responsibility for my actions and I'm prepared to face the consequences." It was just a matter of time how long it would take to get back to the desk of Judge Fox's desk. It didn't take too long because effective Monday September 20th, Lindsay Lohan's probation has been revoked and has a date with Judge Fox on September 25th. Figuring her court date would be sometime this week, and my work schedule had been arranged, I thought this would play out perfectly and I would get to view her mascara ruined tears being played out in front of me. Looks like I'll have to see the highlights instead. 
   FYI: As new details emerge, I will be sure to update. And be sure to be on the lookout for a post sometime Friday evening.
   D-Day Update: After a short closed "seriously no camera's in the courtroom, I wasn't kidding that I would throw you in jail if you violated probation, but please 30 days in jail for failing two drug test is way too harsh a punishment," Lindsay has in fact been thrown in jail. As I learned of the verdict, and the realization that our beloved starlet wouldn't be getting out in 30 days, the question arose; What am I to do for the next 720 hours? 
     Update: A judge in Los Angeles has overturned Judge Fox's decision and has set bail at $300,000. Throughout this crazy summer of celebrity justice, we've come to love the phrase, "If you can pay you don't stay." Listen Lindsay, if you drunk tweet and ask for another jack and coke while you're at it, you have a problem. 


-Sara-

Dear Networks... We've Got A Problem....

Dear ABC, NBC, CBS And FOX,
As the 2010 Fall television line up has been announced, it has been brought to my attention that we have a problem with the Tuesday/Thursday night lineup. Starting with Tuesday night I find it very concerning that I will be forced to choose to view 11 L list celebrities dancing on the dance floor, OR view the amazing I don't know how this show premiered until last May amazingness of a little show called gLee. If you haven't jumped on the gLee bandwagon, give me a call. I'd be willing to let you borrow my Season 1 gLee DVD's. I'm sure you can figure out which one I chose.
     Unfortunately, we have a rather big problem with Thursday nights. After a nice home cooked meal by the in house residence chef, I am presented with the following dilemma. From 9:00 to 10:00 I have the love of my life, why yes as a matter of fact I do have every single episode on DVD, I can't believe I quit watching it for three months after the writer's strike, then once I found out Izzie had cancer I started re-watching, Meredith and Derek's engagement is probably my favorite episode, and you can ask anyone in my family that I can tell you the name of every episode, what season, and the synopsis with in the first 20 seconds, Grey's Anatomy. OR I have the first time I watched it because Grey's was a re-run, okay fine, this is kind of a funny show, the wedding is my favorite episode, I don't know why Steve Carrel is leaving after this season, because without him its not as funny, "The Office". Oooooo it's so hard to choose but I think theres a clear winner in this race.
     The 10:00 hour brings me to my final dilemma. From 10:00 to 11:00 I am faced with the choice of having to choose between watching I saw the preview for it and it looked like a horrible show, I caught a glimpse of it but didn't keep me occupied, then I saw a full episode full of lies, the inside of KARMA Nightclub, I love their names so I'll give it a try and now I'm hooked Jersey Shore, OR the total bore, just come out and say you wear a wig we all know its not your real hair, thanks for giving Bret Michaels the sympathy vote last season, eh you are kind of a compassionate person, thanks for giving ordinary people who have suffered because of the economy another chance at a job, The Apprentice. I think I'll take an hour of my Thursday night and go live in a world of night clubs and gelato shops on the Shore.
     ABC, NBC, CBS And FOX, do you see how much of hassle it is for me to choose? I mean really? After a day of making decisions why can't I come home and just be able to sit down and watch two hours of mindless TV? It's a good thing some genius invented DVR.

Sincerely,
A Concerned Citizen

-Sara-

Cheese For All...

As seen on many fellow Facebook statuses, "Got my first Pumpkin Latte of the season!" "Off to Hubers!" "First tailgate of the college football season!" it's time to acknowledge that fall has indeed arrived. What is it that fall has arrived for me? I'll give you one hint. It's none of these. The harbinger of fall for me is the epically halarious and awesome arrive at 6:30 and stay till 7:30 annual cocktail party given by my hostess with the mostess grandmother.
     Arriving in my killer dress and pink suede shoes accessorized with my pink clutch, it was off to do my I've been serving since I was seven duties. What was I serving you ask? World famous Deccas, and the world famous/Kentucky State Fair Blue Ribbon winning Beat N' Biscuits. Deccas are a family recipe that I think are wonderful. It's almost like a cheese straw, but more fattening. They're pretty delicious. They seemed to be a hit, but not as much as the Beat N' Biscuits. Let me just describe to you what they are. Lard, butter and country ham. There's no other way to put it. They are pretty much a staple in the family. My aunt originally said she would not be making them for the party. After some persuading and "but if you don't have them, people will ask where they are and I'll get the brunt of the complaining." She kindly responded, "okay fine... I'll make them." I decided the easiest way in doing this was I would rotate. One round of deccas, one round of the biscuits. Then repeat for promptly 30 minutes. While passing, I got the "Who are you? Who do you belong to? I haven't seen you at work lately. Are you still working?" conversation starters. First of all, my name is Sara. Second of all, I don't belong to anyone. Okay maybe I do, but you should of said, "who's daughter are you?" Third of all, yes you have seen me at work. I just don't work to your shopping schedule. Fourth of all, I have a life. Work does give me a few days off thank you very much. At promptly 7:00 the dining room doors were open and "dinner" was served. On the menu: Shrimp, tenderloin sandwiches, tomato sandwiches (I personally requested), vegetables with a caesar dressing dipping sauce, and the worlds biggest four or five layer cheese torte. My grandmother had around 70ish people and the torte could have fed 100 comfortably and probably still had left overs. Dessert? Key lime bars and chocolate dipped coconut macaroons. Growing up at these parties, I was told that no eating until the guests had left. I guess being an adult does have it's perk, because I broke the rule. Whoops. I couldn't wait 12 hours to eat. I had purposely not eaten so I could indulge in the finger foods. Yes a few people looked at me but you know what, I earned those sandwiches, so therefore I get to treat myself. I started out with just one tomato sandwich, but after you have one, you can't stop. Yes, a simple piece of pepperidge farm bread cut into a circle, a slice of tomato, mayonnaise, and basil for decoration, can become addicting. At 7:05 I saw the first couple leaving. Two words. PARTY FOUL.7:30 and right on time, people began their "oh it was so nice to see you, you did a wonderful job, your grandchildren are just so sweet" goodbyes. The faster they got out the faster I could take my shoes off. Exactly how long do goodbyes take? Too long, because at 8:15, I gave in and went barefoot.
     Taking place in the same room, sitting in the same spots and the guests had come and gone, it was time for the after party/evaluate/finally get to eat conversation. Okay, so yes it's not exactly polite to talk about people, but we're only talking about the fact that people came a hour early. The invitations were printed in plain english people. As the laughter was flowing, it was time to end the night. We weren't ending the night because we were tired, we ended the night because we had to get home to watch Snooks. After all, the hostess with the mostess did need her beauty sleep.
     A cool September night, serving hors d' oeuvres and missing the NFL Kick off show for the ninth year in a row? Fall 2010 can finally commence.

-Sara-

Diamonds And Dunes...

To do before Five AM Friday morning: Quick trip to Target, run by work, pedicure, fill up on gas before it went up for the Labor Day weekend, Homework, laundry, pack, and bargain with the big guy upstairs to make Hurricane Earl NOT hit Cape Hatteras/Nags Head North Carolina. Please. Just this one weekend. Any other weekend, I could have cared less. My bargain must have worked because I spent Labor Day weekend in Nags Head, NC for a family friend's wedding.
    Before last weekend I have never paid so much close attention to The Weather Channel. You know me and storms. Storms and Sara don't mix. Earlier in the week, we started paying some attention to Earl. We figured that it would do the last minute right turn around and miss Nags Head. The days went by, and Earl continued to strengthen. I had looked forward to this wedding since July and I was determined to go. Wednesday had arrived and Nags Head began the tourist evacuations. I was not about to give up hope yet. Now mind you, the grooms family had already arrived in Nags Head to do last minute preparations. Thursday came. MANDATORY evacuations. We had been keeping in touch with the family all week to see what the conditions were on the island. They had told us that they would be up all Thursday night weathering the storm and that we could call them before we left Friday morning. Being the procrastinator I am, I put off laundry, packing and homework until nine thirty Thursday night. I had to be up and dressed and in the car headed to the airport by 5:45 Friday morning. What else is there to do besides being asleep at two o'clock in the morning? Stalk weather channel god Jim Cantore's up to the minute twitter while he was out in the middle of Earl. After I had received a text from a family friend who was already there, saying that a groomsmen was able to fly into Charlotte, his flight was on time, and got ON the island two hours before the storm had arrived, it was determined I was headed to Nags Head.
    Before heading to the airport, I was told to go with the flow. Not knowing the circumstances on the island, we had booked a hotel for Friday night in Norfolk just in case we were not able to get into Nags Head. I hate change, but if it meant being a day late and at least being able to go, I could deal. Before our plane left, I was told to remember where we had parked the car. I was to remember a parking spot in the long term parking at 6:00 Friday morning. Row K, spot 40. That was my only responsibilty the entire weekend.Our plane left at 7:05 headed to Atlanta. Next stop? Norfolk. Landing in Norfolk, we were greeted with rain. Norfolk is a good two hour drive from Nags Head and there's only one way to get there. The rental car. This was the all important test. If they released the car, we were in the clear. We had gone to the information desk asking if they had knew the conditions of the island. Their response? "Oh you don't want to head there." Breathe Sara. Breathe. Go with the flow. We decided to brave the rain in Norfolk and head to the island. A two hour trip from Norfolk to Nags Head and less than three hours of sleep the night before only meant one thing: nap time.
      Roughly two hours later we arrived at our hotel only to be greeted with, "Sorry. We're short staffed and your room is not ready." Well duh. Everybody and their mom was at least two hours inland to avoid the hurricane. I could have told you that. After exploring the island for at least a good 30 minutes, and arriving back to the hotel, our room was ready. The first thing you do when you get to your destination is unpack your suitcase. Me on the other hand, I lived out of my suitcase for the weekend. I had more important things to do than unpack. It was off to find at least just one more t-shirt I did not need to add to my collection from a really cool restaurant along the beach. First stop? Awful Arthurs.  Known for their delicious steamed shrimp it was off to dinner to catch up with the family of the groom and celebrate the upcoming nuptials. After dinner it was time for the great t-shirt search. I had found some cute shirts but Arthurs was a fail. Across from Arthurs was the pier/boardwalk which happened to be crowded with surfers who were taking advantage of the aftermath of Earl. The group had decided to walk across the street to the boardwalk to really get up close and personal with the east coast.  The night had come to an end after a long day of nerves and traveling.
     Saturday had arrived which brought mom and I outlet shopping while Dad went out golfing with the boys. Being exhausted from the day before and needing my beauty sleep, I awoke at 10:45 Saturday morning to be approached with the thought "We can go to the beach, but due to Earl, flies have invaded." Next choice? Outlet shopping with Mom. First stop? J-Crew with Labor Day Weekend Sales.  Uh Oh. A few weeks back I had seen the latest Fall trend called jeggings. Yes. You heard me right. Jean leggings. You may be thinking "that sounds so 80's." Oh no. It may be one of the best ideas since sliced bread. So cute and so many ways you can dress them up. I told myself I would at least try them on. I found them. I tried them on. I fell in love with them. I bought them. Cooler weather can not come fast enough so I can sport them. Further down the mall? Ralph Lauren. Cute shirt to wear to school for the win. After shopping for the day was over, it was time to go find a bar that covered the UL/UK/football kickoff game. That's a sensitive subject. I'd rather not talk about it.
   Saturday night had finally arrived and it was time for the rehearsal dinner!! Arriving in my adorable Modcloth "Island Block" totally appropriate for the occasion dress and my green reefs, it was off to a night of dinner and mingling. The dinner was held in an outside long hall that had gorgeous views of the bay with multi million dollar yachts, which happened to be the background for lots of pictures :) Knowing that the bride and groom had a big day the next day the night came to end, but lots of excitement to look forward to!
     The big day had finally arrived!! But not before some laying by the pool and going on the complete opposite road to find a "I Survived Hurricane Earl" but not really but wanting a souvenir tee shirt. Whoops. The day I had been waiting for since July to finally debut my adorable dress and killer pink suede shoes for this very special occasion had come. Knowing that the ceremony was at five that afternoon and needing to leave by 4:15, I built in plenty of time to get ready. So I got ready at 2:45ish. Clearly aware that is too much time for a girl to get ready. Finally!!! It was time to see the person who I had spent some of my childhood with was off and getting married. Yeesh. Time flies. The ceremony was absolutely gorgeous and the church was filled with love. The bridesmaids wore navy tea length dresses while the groomsmen wore khaki suits with green ties. It was a brief two block walk from the church to the reception site which seemed like forever walking in my heels. Pain is beauty.
     Reception time!! Walking into a cute, belongs in Nags Head, something you would see in a magazine, reception site it was time for dinner and dancing the night away. At most wedding receptions it is assigned seating. Not this one, which was perfect because we were able to reconnect with some of the friends of the grooms who we had not seen since they were in middle school. On the menu for dinner? Salad, potatoes au gratin, rolls, veggies, and your choice of salmon or roast beef. And then my personal  favorite for dessert? WEDDING CAKE!! I don't know if I like it because it is filled with love or what, but wedding cake ranks way up there. Weird. I know. The cake was vanilla with some sort of maybe lime filling, but definitely delicious. After the cake, its only traditional that the Maid Of Honor and Best Man get up and gave their speeches. Both speeches were sweet and heartfelt. After all the mandatory reception stuff it was time to dance the night away!! Some traditional songs, some top 40 I found my trusty dance partner for the night :) and danced off my drink of choice of the night, cranberry vodka. Highlight of the weekend? Not really sure, because honestly there are too many to name. :) I forgot just how much I love weddings.

-Sara-